The Autistic Yogi Reflects on Dealing with Hard Times and Owning Our Crap

These past years I have found that the best way for me to get through tough times is to focus on my practice. My practice to me is obviously yoga. A have a renewed energy to explore my personal practice that is away from prying eyes that allows me to comfortably explore movement patterns that are new.  
Also refusing to withdraw from people has been a major major help for me in not succumbing to the darker sides of repression and depression. Sometimes though we have moments that slap us in the face and show us that our behaviours are not acceptable, these are harsh lessons, but can add a tremendous amount of value if we find those aspects that lead to positive change.

Recently I had a falling out with a most wonderful friend. It was all my fault, in an act of self assuming indignation I said things that were far less than what consitutes indignation and was actually unrighteous anger. This drove a huge wedge between us and made this person unwilling to share in depth with me any more at this time. Instead of letting this take me down and out I will have my moment of grief and I will take a look at that aspect of me that holds onto attempting to control and manipulate to get what I want and accept that state that I am a mere participant in a divine and evolving play.

Metta